S02E05 - Dueling Pencils
No: 15 |
Season: 2
Episode: 5 |
Air Date: 09-Sep-26 |
Runtime: 24 mins
Summary
Ned and Mare's crusade is delayed when their new podcast gets too spicy; Esmeralda pays the price for embarrassing the company.
Director and Writers
Director: Tazbah Chavez
Writers: Megan Neuringer
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Transcript
Script: S02E05 - Dueling Pencils
Quotes
Travis: I did a solo cocktail cruise last week and came across this while magnet-fishing. Now, I was raised in a household where we learned not to open unmarked oil drums, but I don't know, I guess Esmeralda didn't grow up that way.
Esmeralda: A treasure trove of little bones.
Travis: You know, it smells awful.
Esmeralda: Rodent ivory.
Oscar: They have something. Yes, there is something there. It's not fully emerged. But, is it fun to watch a baby being born? Not always.
Detrick: Circuit City, they've been out of business since 2009, but Ned and Mare's podcast, they don't have any sponsors yet. So I figured if I create a fake ad and other businesses hear it, they might get FOMO. I think... I think it's legal.
Ned: It's two professionals just being professional. Did you know that Hall and Oates can't stand each other offstage? But you would never know it from their killer grooves.
Marv: Well, you could've fooled me.
Ned: In real life, I like brunettes with big naturals.
Marv: Me too.
Marv: This is not a demotion.
Lisa: No. Think of it as a lateral relocation. With an added perk reduction.
Esmeralda: Marv. Why are you doing this to me?
Marv: Barrel of monkeys.
Esmeralda: Well, I was surprised too. But I think we can be grateful that it was not human remains. It was coming from the cosmetics lab, so it's not a big deal. It's natural bones, you know. "Enervate, what's in your barrel?"
Esmeralda: This lateral relocation, as they call it, it's actually a promotion. Nicole is the one eating the stick end of the shit. Look at her in my old, tiny office. It's like a coffin. (laughs) I am in the space of a queen, out there for all to see.
Esmeralda: Do you think I'm the receptionist?
Delivery person: You got the desk.
Barry: It's not that I don't like Esmeralda. It's just that my desk is 50 feet away from the bathroom. If I go 94 times a day, I get my steps in. But if I have to move it closer, then I've got to go the bathroom more than a hundred times a day, and people might think I'm weird.
Ned: We didn't get this upset over ramen.
Mare: No, we didn't. But then again, that was a recorded conversation about soup.
Ned: Well, it's a pasta.
Mare: No.
Ned: In broth.
Mare: Don't. It's soup. It's soup.
Woman: Podcast. Hell, no! I'll just get my books online.
Ned: Hello. Steven. I will be representing your side. It's an honor.
Stephen: Thanks, man. You look like someone drew David Bowie from memory.
Nicole: When a man and a woman breaks up, I like to see when the man is forced to sit down and face the woman that he's still secretly harboring feelings for.
Ned: So Steven's different than I expected. I had pictured someone a little bit like me, I guess. But he turns out to be more like a guy who would kill a neighbor, with a brick.
Esmeralda: Power comes from personality. I don't need my own office. This whole floor is my office. Everyone's desk is my desk. Everyone's lunch... is my lunch. Especially Nicole's.
Notes and Trivia
None
Goofs
None
Locations
Details about common locations, such as opening credits montage locations,
can be found here.
None
Cast
| Domhnall Gleeson | Ned Sampson |
| Sabrina Impacciatore | Esmeralda Grand |
| Chelsea Frei | Mare Pritti |
| Melvin Gregg | Detrick Moore |
| Gbemisola Ikumelo | Adelola Olofin |
| Alex Edelman | Adam Cooper |
| Ramona Young | Nicole Lee |
| Tim Key | Ken Davies |
| Eric Rahill | Travis |
| Duane R. Shepard Sr. | Barry |
| Oscar Nunez | Oscar Martinez |
| Leith M. Burke | |
| Lisa Gilroy | Lisa Graysh |
| Patty Guggenheim | |
| Allan Havey | Marv Putnam |
| Morgan Jay | |
| Nancy Lenehan | Ann Putnam |
| Mo Welch | Kimberly Wilson |
| Alan Aymie | |
| Angel Harper | |
| Cat Navarro | |
